For years, people have debated, what is the best invention ever created? People practically died fighting for what they thought might be the savior of man kind. It’s something that’s for everybody. Something we will all use in our daily activities.
Well for me, I have found this so-called invention and I am here to share it with all of you. Ladies and Gentlemen, I have finally found it, the best invention ever created by man is…
The Booger Picker.
The Booger Picker
Before your violent reactions, please let me explain. The booger picker is a work of wonder.
In the field of science, plagues have spread far and wide and I’m not talking about the dark ages. I am talking about past and present and probably future epidemics, because of man’s greatest weakness; picking boogers manually with our bare skin. Yes, it is greatly overlooked but we all know those elevator buttons in our apartments and offices can never be as clean as we want them, nor the handle bars in the MRT, nor the door knob at our home. The booger picker replaces our fingers unknowingly stopping the epidemic instantly.
In society, imagine a world where we can display media players and cellular phone with built-in booger pickers. Imagine the convenience when the urge to pick your nose would not include running to the nearest comfort room. Imagine a world where booger picking becomes a community activity. Instead of teenagers whispering about first and second base, they will be talking about who picked whose booger. What a damn fine place that would be.
In work, Imagine Pilots distracted by the booger while flying an aircraft. Imagine surgeons performing brain surgery while a booger banging inside their nostrils. Imagine how much productivity the booger picker can save companies. Inflation will definitely go down. Prices would be lowered and the economic down turn will end.
And that is just a fraction of what the booger picker can do. So join me, help me spread the word by chanting this phrase to everybody you know:
Booger Picking with the Booger Picker is not Taboo! Booger Picking with the Booger Picker is not Taboo!
Power to the booger picker. Peace!
#1 by kyoko - December 9th, 2009 at 16:51
I don’t think that booger picker of yours could pick the gooey types of booger (I can’t believe I’m talking about boogers but ok..) ^_^ Get me a really small one for my 2 month old nephew.. the little suction bulb isn’t good enough hahaha ^_^
kyoko´s last blog ..Tessellations
#2 by joelavatari - December 9th, 2009 at 17:14
It works on gooey types as well! But for the liquified mucus-y type, you WILL need the aspirator, which is the second best invention ever IMO.
Don’t use the bulb type. get the one with a silicon hose tip so you can really go inside the nose and suck those green sticky mucus out!
#3 by Ade - December 9th, 2009 at 17:05
WHERE DO I BUY THIS
Ade´s last blog ..Talking to (a very cranky) Santa
#4 by joelavatari - December 9th, 2009 at 17:17
That’s the thing. It cannot be bought! It must be given to you by the heavens above as a blessing for your good deeds.
But if you really want one, you could also try the infant section of SM department store.
#5 by dawg - December 9th, 2009 at 20:39
hands-on pa rin! Or is it fingers-on?
#6 by Joel Avatari - December 11th, 2009 at 14:51
Just make sure your fingernails are of the desired length. You don’t want to over do it and scratch blood vessels inside!!
#7 by eRLyN - February 9th, 2010 at 00:24
to each his own as they say. you’re entitled to feel that the boogie picker is the best invention ever.
got here via dementia’s plurk. care to exchange links?
eRLyN´s last blog ..Resuming my no rice diet
#8 by joelavatari - February 23rd, 2010 at 23:35
You also use your fingers?
Sure ba!
#9 by isel - February 18th, 2010 at 20:16
Necessity is the mother of invention; and I’m more curious how you found this.
isel´s last blog ..All this shit just to watch Trivium
#10 by joelavatari - February 23rd, 2010 at 23:36
Long story short, I had a very bad cold.